It’s March 25th and that means it is National Bridesmaids Day! A day to celebrate those wonderful wonderful women (and best-guys-for-gals) that are currently or have stood by you through dress fittings and showers and crazy family demands, not to mention all the years they knew you before you decided to propose to them. They are the only people I will concede have an even better spot at the ceremony than my beloved aisle seat: they get to be, often, right up in the action. So close they can hear you stammer down an emotional gasp or catch a glimpse of your mom when you say your vows.

They are also incredibly important.

There’s so much we do in general to plan a day our guests will enjoy: good music, decorations, good food, and great drinks. But sometimes it’s important to go that extra mile for those all-too-important ladies in your life so that they truly feel special. Here is a list of things I’ve seen done, experienced first hand, or did for my own fabulous friends that may be worth considering doing on your own day:

• Write them a note or letter expressing why it means so much that they are there.
  • I know this one is obvious for me– I’ve already proclaimed my love for the old-fashioned art of writing. But this particular method has proven true every time. At every wedding I have been in (including my own) I have written something for my friends. For one of my best friends, it was my Maid of Honor speech. For another friend, I wrote her a letter and gave it to her while she got ready–prior to eye make-up application in case of tears. For my own wedding, I gave each bridesmaid a letter telling  her why she mattered so much to me and how much I appreciated her being there. It didn’t cost me anything other than time, but each time I’ve managed a tear (or hundreds) out of those who received my special note.
• Give them a BIG hug when you first see them on your BIG day.
  • I have one beautiful friend who is known by everyone as “a hugger.” Whether it be a long-overdue reunion, after a few glasses of wine, or during a special moment, you can expect her to grab you– big and warm and close– to show you how much you mean to her. And, as basic as it sounds, it really does work. It may seem trivial or obvious, but sometimes a hug or hand hold or excited squeal (which is totally appropriate at any wedding event even if you aren’t normally a squealer) can naturally show your lovely lady just how important she is to you. Personally, I suggest hugging more than once– just make sure not to smear the eye shadow or tug the updo.
• Take individual portraits with each bridesmaid as well as with the entire bridal party.
  • When you are making your must-have list for your photographer, be sure to have her write down bridesmaid portraits. You’ll be taking plenty of pictures with the entire crew and, of course, a few “fake laugh” group photos, but make sure to get a picture with each bridesmaid. If you have a traditional pose you’ve been doing since college or a photo you want to recreate with your sister from your first cotillion, then have at it! It’s something that both you and your girl can cherish for years after your day.
• Give them a gift to thank them.
  • Being a bridesmaid is a ton of work and usually a bit pricey. You help shop, craft, attend every event, answer every emergency phone call, organize the bachelorette, help with the shower, and usually end up on bathroom duty at least once on the big day because when fashion designers started making wedding dresses, they forgot that women– even brides– have to pee. A gift is generally expected, but it doesn’t have to be extravagant. Usually, the rule of thumb is that, however much the average cost of the bridesmaid dresses are, is how much, at least,  your gift should cost. In the past I have received a gift certificate to a spa, a Coach clutch, and I gave a clutch and bracelet to my girls. I also have friends that gave a gift card to favorite stores, a small bottle of each girl’s favorite perfume, and/or a favorite bottle of wine for each bridesmaid. And, just saying, a gift is a natural way to insert that handwritten note on a card for added sentimentality and appreciation.
• Save a dance for them at the reception.
  • You’ll be told time and time again that the wedding will go by in a blur. The saying is true, especially if you are having a shorter reception or have a larger guest list. It will be hard to spend quality time with each person there. In fact, one of my few regrets from my wedding day is that I didn’t get to have a long conversation or dance with every person there. Of course, you know that you’ll talk to your immediate family and you’ll make time for the boss or any guest who traveled to get to you, but remember that even though you spent the entire morning getting ready and taking pictures, your bridesmaids love you and want to spend as much time with you as possible. My suggestion? Make sure there’s one song on your DJ playlist for you and your girls, let them and your groom know ahead of time, and when that beat starts playing, head to the dance floor for a few minutes dedicated to just them. Not having a dance party at your event? Perhaps plan to meet them at the photo booth or make sure they know you guys are taking a Lady Love shot at the bar (remember to let your photographer in on these plans: the pictures will be amazing).
• Buy them food during hair and make up prep time.
  • Getting ready, though tons of fun, is also exhausting. If you are starting early in the day, it may mean coffee addicts and grumbling bellies. Instead of having a hoard of hangry (hungry+angry) ladies on your hands, plan ahead and treat them to breakfast or lunch or both. The best way to someone’s heart is through their stomach, and that is never more true than when you’ve been seated with the hairdresser for an hour first thing in the morning.
• Have a tiny surprise waiting for them at the venue.
  • This one is a bit harder to pull off and a slight extension of the “gift” idea above, but also extra fun and something unexpected for most. I had one friend have flip flops in each girl’s size waiting for them at their seats to prep for a night of dancing without wearing those cursed heals! For my day, I wrote a note to each guest inside their place cards, which included the bridal party. So although I thanked them before I said “I do,” I also thanked them after. My one bestie made sure to have a sweeter wine in my glass (I’m a lover of all things sugar and butter) rather than the dryer wines for most guests. It was delicious and a pleasant surprise when we began toasts.

Whatever you do, just plan a little bit of time to love and appreciate your special friends the day of your wedding. You chose them for a reason; let them in on what that reason is.